How to Get Ahead by Making It Up As You Go

Have you ever had one of those weeks where there were so many things going on that you felt immobilized? Not necessarily debilitated, but, significantly struggling? It’s times like these that you wish you were more coordinated. Wanting to balance on the ball of life, but just when you think you’ve found your positioning — just when you think you’re grounded — gravity happens.

There are a lot of variables that might tilt you in your choices — literally and figuratively — but at some point, you have to make it up as you go.

Step 1: Don’t be afraid to fall on your head

Instead, wear a helmet. Rather than fearing the falling, learn the best way to land. You see this all the time with athletes: they prepare for impact and learn techniques to quickly recover. The same is true in every activity. When you venture to try something new, you are bound to fall on your head sometimes. And yes, it will hurt, but there is no reward without risk.

It is a common misconception that risk-taking is a bad thing. Just because you might lose your balance doesn’t mean you shouldn’t still try to find your center. In fact, with the constant demands of life — whether that’s work, kids, school, or just a pressure to keep up — it becomes increasingly necessary that you prepare for the inevitable wobble in your effort to balance.

Step 2: Let others critique you

I remember when I was in art school, every week we would have to present the art that we made to the entire class. There were times when it was excruciating to endure the critiques of others, but through this process, we all learned valuable lessons — not only about the creative process, but about the value of feedback.

Of course, not everyone knows how to deliver feedback in a tactful way. Some people are going to critique you with zero sensitivity, but let them. Listen to the critique itself, not the criticism. Your efforts are not you. Your efforts are your efforts. It is important to be able to distinguish the difference between who you are, and what you do.

Learning how to give feedback kindly, and receive feedback with nobility are underrated strengths in our society.

Step 3: Lick your wounds

Now, be careful here. I’m not saying you should sit around and feel bad for yourself — at least not for too long. But this analogy is in reference to the healing powers of saliva! And by that, I mean, heal your wounds. Don’t allow them to make you bitter. Don’t recluse at the fear of failure. Embrace the wobble, take the criticism, adapt your approach and keep going.

The wounds that we acquire, whether self inflicted or otherwise, play a role in our survival. Maybe you needed to get burned by the stove to respect the heat. Maybe the only way to learn to ride a bike is to fall fifteen times. Maybe the only way to get a promotion is to occasionally look like a fool. Maybe the secret to healthy relationships lies somewhere in getting your heart broken. Life is a gamble, and you’ve gotta roll with the punches.

Step 4: Make like a phoenix and rise

Every hero has a dark night of the soul. We follow along as they set out on their journey to conquer some aspect of their reality, and half of the time they are making it up as they go. When the night is at its darkest, and we worry that the sun will never come — our hero finds it within themselves to rise up anyway. We applaud, grateful for the happy ending, but do we consider our own reservoir of strength when it comes to our personal journey?

Where do your thoughts take you when you’re trying to get back up? Do you dwell on your failures, or do you focus on your goals? You can be the hero of your story, or you can be your own adversary. Who knows, maybe you’re in flux between both? When you’re making it up as you go, there are small choices that you make that lead to more choices, and at times those choices could be many or few. You will see those choices dwindle or grow depending on your perspective. But one way or another, you have to choose.

Step 5: Have fun with it

Making it up as you go could be scary, but it also gives you the freedom to have fun with it. If you do everything the way you’re supposed to, or the way someone tells you too, than you miss out on the falling, learning, healing, and rising from the ashes. You also miss out on a whole bunch of fun.

The journey may be a bumpy one but they don’t call it a joyride for nothing!

Whether you’re making it up as you go in your professional life, in your hobbies, as a parent, friend, or student — try to have fun with it. Stretch yourself like a rubber band to figure out your limits. Reel yourself back in to define your boundaries. Be foolish. Be hungry. And never stop making it up as you go.

Final thoughts

Most of the time none of us really know — ultimately — where we’re going, what we’re doing, or how we will do it. Especially not when we’re first starting out. Once you take the first step, though, the second step becomes more obvious. The goal is not to have it all figured out at the beginning, but to have a direction in mind and use these five steps to make it up as you go!